When I saw the prompt for this weeks post- Surprise- I knew just what to write about. (I won't be using any names as some of the players are still living)
Just imagine my surprise when I discovered Mom had 3 half siblings we never knew about!! My parents and grandparents are all gone. There's no one to ask, but I have to wonder if my Mom even knew about them!
There were stories that Grandad was married before he met Grandma. We even suspected he was still married to his first wife when they got together.... there were quiet rumblings in the family... suggestions of a scandal of that sort.
My Grandad had moved into the area where Grandma lived in a time of recession... he went where the work was. They met and fell in love. And he was the love of my Grandma's life! They had a son together, then a few years later my Mom.
Unfortunately, Grandad was diagnosed with cancer. Grandma took care of him at home until he died, just after Mom's 1st birthday.
Grandma and Mom later immigrated to Canada. Grandma met someone else, remarried and had a couple more children. And no one ever talked about the past. I knew Grandad's name and that he died of cancer before Mom was 2. That's about it.
After Mom died, I got into genealogy and began researching my Grandparents story. We knew they may not have been
married when my uncle was born, but believed they had married by the
time Mom came along. I know how these things go. I know you have to take
those family stories with a grain of salt. I was prepared when I found out
they never actually married.
A couple years passed by, I was busy researching other lines of the family. Then one day, I suddenly wondered if Grandad could have had children with his first wife. I don't know why I had never considered that before. I did the research and sure enough.... I found they'd had 3 children together! My Mom had 3 half-siblings!
Did Mom know about them? Did Grandma? I hope Grandma did! They lived quite a distance apart, so wouldn't have ever run into each other. I don't know if Grandma even knew any of Grandad's family. Why don't we ask more questions?
From what I can tell, one half-sibling died young. And another has such a common name, I can't be sure I have the right person. As I was researching the 3rd, I came across her obituary. I was about 8 months late to maybe be able to connect with her. I managed to connect with one of her daughter-in-law's though. She was interested in working together to find out more, but when she broached the family, they wanted nothing to do with it.
There won't be any happy family reunions for this family! I am disappointed, I would have liked to learn what they could tell me about my Grandad. (if anything- since the kids were pretty young when he left). But I completely understand how they'd feel with something like that coming out of left field. I respect their wishes.
I'm sure there will be other surprises as I continue this journey of learning where and who I came from, but probably none quite like the surprise of finding my Mom had 3 half siblings!
Tuesday, February 5, 2019
Monday, February 4, 2019
At the Library
Oh, the things you can learn at the library! Rows and rows of books, filled with any subject you can imagine. And for a genealogist, what better place to look for information about our ancestors.
I don't live near the area where my ancestors lived, so unfortunately can't check out those libraries myself.
A few years ago, I joined the Saskatchewan Genealogy Society. Included in the membership was access to their library. And as a distant member, they would mail the books out to me! What a great service. I borrowed many books in the couple years I was a member and learned so much about my ancestors.
As I read through the books, I got a sense of the lives they lived and the types of people they were. And I learned about the communities they lived in. I only wish the stories about my family included the photos found in some other family stories!
I'm also trying to build my own family history library. I've managed to track down a few of those books that include articles about my family. And I've collected a few general genealogy books to add to the collection.
Whether it's a local library, your own home library, a distant library or even an on-line library, it seems you can always learn something new.
I'd Like to Meet..... My 2X Great Grandmother, Barbara Spisak
The 52 Ancestors in 52 Weeks prompt for this week is- "I'd like to meet."
There are so many on the list of who I'd like to meet, but I'd really like to talk to my 2nd great grandmother, Barbara Spisak.
She was born Oct 10 1856, in Garadna, Hungary, one of 8 children for her parents... and the only one to survive infancy! I don't know how her parents lived through such heartache. I imagine they treasured their little girl, and likely held their breath every day with the fear of losing her as well.
Barbara lost her father when she was just 5. Her mother remarried shortly after, but then she too passed away. Barbara was only 13. Such a tough age for a little girl to lose her mother. I wonder if she stayed with her step-father. Or was there other family that took her in? This is one of the things I would ask Barbara about. I'd want to know about her childhood. Was it a house full of sadness? Or did she feel treasured and loved and happy?
On June 22 1874, at 17 years old, Barbara married my great great grandfather, Peter Kristof, who was older by 10 years. Peter's family had their share of heartache as well. He was one of 9 children, at least 3 died as babies. Then his father died less than 2 months after Peter and Barbara were married.
About a year into the marriage Barbara became a mother for the first time, welcoming a little baby boy. My heart broke for her when I found that little Janos Peter lived only a few days.
A year later, they had another little boy, Janos Gyula, who would become my great grandfather.
In 1878 came another little boy, Dezso Elemer. This one lived about 2 years, dying a few months before his sister, Maria Otilia was born. Maria also only lived a few months. Peter and Barbara buried 2 babies that year, 9 months apart.
Borbala Otilia joined the family in June 1882, and she survived! They were now a little family of 4.
I would ask my 2x great grandmother how she survived those years... so young and losing 3 babies. Her mother was gone. Who was there to guide her through her grief?
About this time, a decision was made to emigrate to the United States. Peter, his younger brother Andras, and Janos Brunjanski (who was married to his sister Maria), would all head to Pennsylvania. The women and children to follow later.
Who's decision was it to leave? Was it a decision they made together? Andras was the first to go. Did he then convince the others to follow? Or was that the plan all along? And what did Barbara think of all this? How did she feel being left with 2 children for who knows how long until she could join her husband?
In October of 1883, Barbara took her children and made her way to Hamburg, Germany- about 1200 km away- before boarding the Rugia, on Oct 31, for a 17 day trip across the ocean to New York, New York... and to her husband.
I would love to hear about the journey. How did she feel leaving her home, knowing she'd likely never be back? How was the voyage? Was she counting the days until she'd be reunited with her husband? What was it like arriving in the new country, a whole new world?
Peter and Barbara were in the States for about 6 years. Their little family expanded by 2 with the birth of Barbara in 1885, then Peter in 1886. But this wasn't the life they had envisioned. Peter was working in a mine... long hours, poor working conditions and low wages. They wanted better for their family.
By 1889, they were among the original homesteaders in Esterhazy, Saskatchewan, Canada. 160 acres of free land! (providing they met all the conditions set out in the Homestead Act). It must have seemed a dream to be able own all that land. Their homestead was next to Peter's brother, and his sister lived nearby.
They were told the land was very rich, great for growing crops! They weren't told it was covered in forest, or just how harsh those prairie winters were. Many families couldn't make it. They gave up and abandoned their homesteads. Peter and Barbara worked hard to build a good life and a successful farm. They even took on a 2nd homestead, another 160 acres.
I would ask Barbara about those early years in Esterhazy. How was it for her, trying to raise the children and make a home for her family? What was their first home like? Homesteading is really hard work for the men, but it would have been just as hard for the women.
Peter and Barbara seemed to do well in Esterhazy. Over the next decade they had 6 more children- Joseph, Andrew, Mary, Julia, John and Annie. I imagine this was a happy time for my great great grandmother, although it wasn't all a bed of roses. There were hardships and illnesses. They buried 3 more children in their teens, due to illness. But they were part of a community, many from the old village of Garadna. The families helped each other with farming duties. Everyone gathered for weddings and baptisms and supported each other when loved ones were lost.
By 1911 Peter and Barbara had uprooted and headed to Humboldt, Saskatchewan, where they were once again early settlers, homesteading the land. She was 55 by then, her husband was 65. Why would they want to start all over again? I suspect the move was to ensure their younger sons would have access to homesteads of their own.
What did Barbara think of this move? Did she think her husband was nuts? Or was she fully supportive of it? How did she feel leaving the home they had built together? The first real home the family had.
How was life in Humboldt? In a local family history book, there is a picture of the house Peter built in Humboldt. It looked like a fine home. I hope it was also a happy one.
Barbara lost her husband of almost 51 years on April 12 1925. She lived another 20 years on the family farm with one of their sons. She is buried next to Peter, in the Holy Trinity Roman Catholic Hungarian cemetery. I wasn't able to meet Barbara, but I was able to pay my respects when I visited the cemetery with my daughters in 2014.
I have never seen a photo of my great great grandmother. I picture a strong, hard working woman, her hair pulled back into a bun, an apron covering her dress. She'd be a wonderful cook. (Perhaps she'd even cook up a little something for me, when she visited) She'd be a strict, but loving mother. The house would be full of noise and activity and laughter. And I suspect there'd be no doubt who really ran the household.
I have so many questions. I want to know her story. I don't just want to meet her, I'd like her to spend a few days with me. If only she could....
Sources I've used to piece together Barbara's life -
-Hungary, Abauj-Torna, Idrany- Roman Catholic church records. First accessed on Family History Library film #623413. No available on familysearch.org, DGS #7782350
-Esterhazy and Early Hungarian Immigration to Canada, by Martin Louis Kovacs
-Kaposvar. A Counts Colony. 1886-1986. Kaposvar Historic Site (1975) Society, Esterhazy, Saskatchewan.
-Through the Fields of Time- Plunkett and District. 1982. Plunkett History Committee
-Census records of Canada, 1891-1921; accessed on Ancestry.ca
-Passenger lists; accessed on Ancestry.ca
There are so many on the list of who I'd like to meet, but I'd really like to talk to my 2nd great grandmother, Barbara Spisak.
She was born Oct 10 1856, in Garadna, Hungary, one of 8 children for her parents... and the only one to survive infancy! I don't know how her parents lived through such heartache. I imagine they treasured their little girl, and likely held their breath every day with the fear of losing her as well.
Barbara lost her father when she was just 5. Her mother remarried shortly after, but then she too passed away. Barbara was only 13. Such a tough age for a little girl to lose her mother. I wonder if she stayed with her step-father. Or was there other family that took her in? This is one of the things I would ask Barbara about. I'd want to know about her childhood. Was it a house full of sadness? Or did she feel treasured and loved and happy?
On June 22 1874, at 17 years old, Barbara married my great great grandfather, Peter Kristof, who was older by 10 years. Peter's family had their share of heartache as well. He was one of 9 children, at least 3 died as babies. Then his father died less than 2 months after Peter and Barbara were married.
About a year into the marriage Barbara became a mother for the first time, welcoming a little baby boy. My heart broke for her when I found that little Janos Peter lived only a few days.
A year later, they had another little boy, Janos Gyula, who would become my great grandfather.
In 1878 came another little boy, Dezso Elemer. This one lived about 2 years, dying a few months before his sister, Maria Otilia was born. Maria also only lived a few months. Peter and Barbara buried 2 babies that year, 9 months apart.
Borbala Otilia joined the family in June 1882, and she survived! They were now a little family of 4.
I would ask my 2x great grandmother how she survived those years... so young and losing 3 babies. Her mother was gone. Who was there to guide her through her grief?
About this time, a decision was made to emigrate to the United States. Peter, his younger brother Andras, and Janos Brunjanski (who was married to his sister Maria), would all head to Pennsylvania. The women and children to follow later.
Who's decision was it to leave? Was it a decision they made together? Andras was the first to go. Did he then convince the others to follow? Or was that the plan all along? And what did Barbara think of all this? How did she feel being left with 2 children for who knows how long until she could join her husband?
In October of 1883, Barbara took her children and made her way to Hamburg, Germany- about 1200 km away- before boarding the Rugia, on Oct 31, for a 17 day trip across the ocean to New York, New York... and to her husband.
I would love to hear about the journey. How did she feel leaving her home, knowing she'd likely never be back? How was the voyage? Was she counting the days until she'd be reunited with her husband? What was it like arriving in the new country, a whole new world?
Peter and Barbara were in the States for about 6 years. Their little family expanded by 2 with the birth of Barbara in 1885, then Peter in 1886. But this wasn't the life they had envisioned. Peter was working in a mine... long hours, poor working conditions and low wages. They wanted better for their family.
By 1889, they were among the original homesteaders in Esterhazy, Saskatchewan, Canada. 160 acres of free land! (providing they met all the conditions set out in the Homestead Act). It must have seemed a dream to be able own all that land. Their homestead was next to Peter's brother, and his sister lived nearby.
They were told the land was very rich, great for growing crops! They weren't told it was covered in forest, or just how harsh those prairie winters were. Many families couldn't make it. They gave up and abandoned their homesteads. Peter and Barbara worked hard to build a good life and a successful farm. They even took on a 2nd homestead, another 160 acres.
I would ask Barbara about those early years in Esterhazy. How was it for her, trying to raise the children and make a home for her family? What was their first home like? Homesteading is really hard work for the men, but it would have been just as hard for the women.
Peter and Barbara seemed to do well in Esterhazy. Over the next decade they had 6 more children- Joseph, Andrew, Mary, Julia, John and Annie. I imagine this was a happy time for my great great grandmother, although it wasn't all a bed of roses. There were hardships and illnesses. They buried 3 more children in their teens, due to illness. But they were part of a community, many from the old village of Garadna. The families helped each other with farming duties. Everyone gathered for weddings and baptisms and supported each other when loved ones were lost.
By 1911 Peter and Barbara had uprooted and headed to Humboldt, Saskatchewan, where they were once again early settlers, homesteading the land. She was 55 by then, her husband was 65. Why would they want to start all over again? I suspect the move was to ensure their younger sons would have access to homesteads of their own.
What did Barbara think of this move? Did she think her husband was nuts? Or was she fully supportive of it? How did she feel leaving the home they had built together? The first real home the family had.
How was life in Humboldt? In a local family history book, there is a picture of the house Peter built in Humboldt. It looked like a fine home. I hope it was also a happy one.
Barbara lost her husband of almost 51 years on April 12 1925. She lived another 20 years on the family farm with one of their sons. She is buried next to Peter, in the Holy Trinity Roman Catholic Hungarian cemetery. I wasn't able to meet Barbara, but I was able to pay my respects when I visited the cemetery with my daughters in 2014.
I have never seen a photo of my great great grandmother. I picture a strong, hard working woman, her hair pulled back into a bun, an apron covering her dress. She'd be a wonderful cook. (Perhaps she'd even cook up a little something for me, when she visited) She'd be a strict, but loving mother. The house would be full of noise and activity and laughter. And I suspect there'd be no doubt who really ran the household.
I have so many questions. I want to know her story. I don't just want to meet her, I'd like her to spend a few days with me. If only she could....
Sources I've used to piece together Barbara's life -
-Hungary, Abauj-Torna, Idrany- Roman Catholic church records. First accessed on Family History Library film #623413. No available on familysearch.org, DGS #7782350
-Esterhazy and Early Hungarian Immigration to Canada, by Martin Louis Kovacs
-Kaposvar. A Counts Colony. 1886-1986. Kaposvar Historic Site (1975) Society, Esterhazy, Saskatchewan.
-Through the Fields of Time- Plunkett and District. 1982. Plunkett History Committee
-Census records of Canada, 1891-1921; accessed on Ancestry.ca
-Passenger lists; accessed on Ancestry.ca
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